"All conspiracies are true.
Small perceived inconsistencies in any story or event is
unshakable proof of the greater falsehood.
All conspiracies are designed and carried out by wildly powerful
evil people, and always toward evil ends.
Those involved will never divulge their secrete participation.
All conspiracies are more complicated and elaborate than most
human endeavors to date.
Conspiracists know what I am talking about!