Friday, July 12, 2013

Behind the Veil

Sherlilyn Fenn by karen kuehn
Observed & Observer

Baring witness to my own experiences to maximize creating.
So much life!
To participate and be part of something with intent . . .
Or unconsciously in motion ?
There are those that see the light and grasp it no matter the affect upon others!
All things are connected like it or not.
True consumers have to have it or be linked to it.
Some sort of validation for what maybe lacking?
The light workers they just truly shine.
Not everyone is light that states it either!
Be advised to note actions that are authentic.
Light is not endless it comes and goes like the moon waxing and waning.
I have shined and I have shadowed.
I mean well always.
There are those who have to be best postured alongside truly creative people to feel apart of something. 
And those folks can be a positive force just by being there as well.
Just remember to have a healthy boundary that serves the end idea.
People are hugely feeling creatures and even with the best intent they get their feelings hurt.
You can't control others preceptions, feelings and actions. 
Do your best to be kind and loving always.
Artist need their space to create.
I have felt such extremes working on all my Burning Man projects.
Support and the rug pulled out.
I can only witness and learn.
Many types of artist manifesting amazing works.
My observation is those that truly are abundant keep reserved and continue to create.
Letting their hair down post creation.  Freely but mind you they feel the blues.
I have never felt I had to be APART of anything in my life other than living it good.
Good intentions by my actions.  
Almost impossible to maintain when you interact with others.
So...allowing all kinds of characters in my life has given and taken.
Its a mutual dance that only those in real touch can account.
Labeled by people who know and absolutely don’t know me but like to think they do!
I find it odd and sometimes hurtful.
I have had to deflect bullets for others lack of something. . .
A need to gossip or be connected to what?  
Liked for what reason?
Truth is each persons story they stir and create to make themselves RIGHT.
I find this to be the truth of most folks.
And yet oddly dishonest if we look in the mirror right?
What is neither my question nor my problem?
I can only hold compassion for those people. 
Super intuitive souls have a blessing and curse.
I got it.
I see things…and even more I feel things deeply across the board from many.
If you’re reading this and you feel it’s pointed at you…well maybe those are your issues arising in your behavior.
  We all have had our moments.  The mirror can be glaring.
 I look at the feeling and the idea that another could feel or scapegoat possibly their short comings, their  “stories.” 
I don’t have a mean bone in my body but like a lion you cross me I stop in my tracks and face it.  
I question all thoughts and the mouths it comes from...valid or not?
We can love many types of people and than they can just turn their back on a dime on you.
All experiences seem to lead to lessons.  
 To ponder and make better your next experience.
One can only hope.  Be brave and do it.
A clearing of bullshit, editing out those that drain has been key in being more peaceful.
I live away from the parties and posturing. 
 I love a good event mind you, but you will never see me posing more than creating.
I just do.  And I have allowed some energies into my life that tested my entire core being.
I don’t think I’ll ever make the same mistakes but I can tell you that my time is more guarded for creating art and love.
Waste not your time on chatter and people who play with souls for self-elevation.
They are the more fragile souls that need a lot more than most of us are able to give.
They will suck the life out of your soul with no regard.
Party on to the next pattern of their life with no guilt or care for what you feel is odd behavior. 
 I am as Duane Michals age 81, said to me last week. 

My god you're still a kid. 
Start taking honest pictures about your own truth. 
There is only one Karen Kuehn.”  

 Duane Michals

Which way will I go?
I don't know but I can tell you that if I have been there done that....I might change up for a bigger adventure.
Also for some folks if you are doing what you have always done...remember the results good or boringly bad maybe the description that best describes INSANITY.
Growing is hard esp if your an elder that has habits.
Change for yourself and your art will adapt to the new you.

The truth of me is life is like a gray scale full of tonality.
I tend to see light but love the shadow side.
Emotionally I love the joyful side so maybe it will be the mystery in the dark where joy lays its head privately.
Sacred images about mindful feelings might be my next stop.

Good Day. 

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